Finding A Home and Being Accepted

Posted on Aug 12th, 2009 by

THIS TIME, we meet our wise little bat, Vek. From the moment he arrived in our community, he has held a special place in my heart. Not only because he's our youngest member, but because he's the sweetest!

Here is Vek's experience:

"I never expected to stay long on the island. I never expected it to be my SL home, but sometimes things surprise us, just like our community did. It has surprised me a lot.

When I first came to the island, I had just bought a little do-dad to hop me around random sims. Which unfortunately led to a bad day. I had several times that day been kicked out, yelled at, and generaly harrased for not having a human avatar. When I hit the button again, with that fateful jump to the island I was in a foul mood.

First thing I noticed when I got there was that I had landed in a stone circle, on it where candles with people's prayers on them, which was a good sign. I had thought it was going to be another one of those sims cut into little squares.

I explored for a bit, spotting several people gathered together and chatting. I tried my best to hide near enough to hear what they were talking about. I can't remember what they were talking about, but I was spotted. They were friendly, so I showed myself.

I sat and talked to them for a long time, forgetting that I had to sleep for work. I made a friend that day, and kept coming back to the island.

I spent my time hopping around random sims for a week or so, but every time I would have enough of that, I would come back to the island and talk about things ranging from sustainablilty to philosophy, even music. I hadn't noticed, then but I was spending more and more time there.

Soon I was there everyday, most of my time taken up by the island. I soon made friends with other people on the island. Little did I know, but I was one of the community now!

The biggest surprise of this paradise was that they accepted me."

Vek has since taken on responsibility for the security of the island. He welcome visitors and shows them around if they would like a tour. He also keeps an eye on visitors and lets them know what our philosophy is and how we like everyone to be treated with respect and consideration.

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Tagged with: Second Life, community, acceptance, philosophy, sustainability, sense of belonging.

Our 'Nomad' Speaks ...

Posted on Feb 20th, 2009 by

asecondlifediary

I've asked one of our most active community members to write an entry for our blog. I'll call him Gerry, so in future entries you can recognise him.

And here he is:

I came to the Island to meet a friend, and was intrigued by the welcome note. I had no idea what intentional communities are, but sustainability is certainly close to my heart. The idea of 'simulating' a sustainable community really appealed to me. And as if that was not enough, I saw the beautiful waves at the rocky beach, and it was love at first sight!

Till then I was a nomadic wanderer on SL… but after coming here, I started spending hours on this sim. Lying on the rocks, getting drenched by the waves, and talking to whoever came along and stopped to chat. I became a member of the Island community and also got onto the Ning forum, but I was not really inclined to contribute. I had come to SL in an 'RL wounded' state and was still hurting. I was not going to get 'involved' into anything!

This was a time of transition – for both myself in SL and also for our community. I had met a remarkable girl in SL who was making me sit up and take interest in my (second) life, and at the same time, the Island community was suddenly coming alive around me. The reins of the
community seemed to be in the hands of this energetic natural 'teacher', and she was galvanising people into action. Urging people to learn this or that, to take up this or that project, to attend meetings, to contribute… It was interesting to watch the community being stirred awake from the vantage point of the rocks on the beach.

And then one day my new friend and I discovered the cave. The animation called 'devotion' became our favourite. It conveyed something deeper to us than just the motions that our avatars went through. It helped us 'connect' at psychological and mental levels in ways that I had never imagined possible. But one day, I came to know that there was a suggestion to take the cave out to resolve the prim issue – that was the biggest problem facing the community then – we were fast running out of spare prims.

I couldn't bear the thought of the cave going away. It was almost a matter of life and death for me! And that is how, against my best intentions, I landed up in one of the meetings – all ready to fight for the cave!

The community didn't fight back. On the other hand, it embraced me. My earnestness was laughed at a bit, but mostly appreciated. And the cave was spared. The 'teacher' said she will go around the island trimming
everything to free up prims and the cave need not go.

I sort of got pulled into the community after that. People knew me now. So they stopped by to chat. Despite myself, I started giving opinions, suggestions… And yet, I resisted all attempts to make me take up a 'project'! Another new member, who had also come to the Island around the same time as me, got involved into learning to build and all, but I fielded all 'attacks' on me with good humour but refused to be drawn in. I was happy sitting on my rock, and was happy to observe, and I had great fun pulling the 'teacher's' leg about always wanting to get people to work at something or other!

One of the most interesting activities during this 'happening' period, was the hut decoration competition. I thought it was an ideal 'simulation' for people wanting to get a handle of the concept of sustainable life style. To design a comfortable and pleasant dwelling using the very limited SL resource – just 10 prims. Although I was
interested in the concept, I was not going to learn building in order to participate in the competition! But I encouraged my girlfriend to enter. She was a bit hesitant due to her time constraints, but once she decided to jump in, she went at it with all enthusiasm.

Of course all was not nice and smooth. 'The teacher' was brimming with ideas and I felt that she was pushing things along at a pace that not everyone was comfortable with. She was a naturally 'bossy' person and although tried honestly to curb that tendency, she wasn't successful
most of the time. And there were differences of opinion in the community about what exactly the goals were and what deemed as 'contribution' and what didn't. Although I was getting involved into attending meetings, greeting new visitors, etc., I was still a distant observer rather than a 'stakeholder' and I could see that while on one hand the island was bustling with a lot of positive energy, there was
also a growing unrest and uneasiness on another hand.

I could sense that trouble was round the corner and it struck rather unexpectedly. Little skirmishes blew out of proportions, some of the long standing members started distancing themselves from the community, uncomfortable issues about who is leading and who should lead, etc., started cropping up. And then one day suddenly the island went peaceful – a depressing and uneasy quiet descended on things. 'The Teacher' just distanced herself from everything, and things
collapsed down like a balloon that had sprung a leak. Things just stopped happening. 'The teacher' felt that she had proved a point by that – the point that she was driving the momentum and that her leadership was crucial to its success.

To my mind, if this was a test of 'leadership', it was actually a failure. A true leader is the one who enables others and gives the direction, and not the one who has to be in the driving seat all the time! At the same time it was unfair to not acknowledge all the hard work that 'the teacher' had put into galvanising the community into
action. That initial impetus was very crucial and very valuable. I also felt that the resentment of some of the members was unjustified to some extent and the various little skirmishes had happened because different people had different visions and different understanding of
expectations as well as obligations. The goals were not clearly defined. That to my mind was the crux of the problem.

I had a lot of mental struggle before I decided to take the second crucial step in becoming more involved in the community. Getting 'involved' into 'tilting at windmills' in RL had resulted mostly into disappointments and also pain in recent years… I certainly did not want to go down the same route in SL… and yet you cannot really stop
being yourself – whether you are a flesh and blood real person or a virtual avatar…

I finally surrendered to myself and shared with all community members my thoughts about what was happening to the community. I earnestly expressed the need to come together and define a statement of purpose,
and the roles, responsibilities and rights of members. Some half hearted attempts had happened earlier, but a final document clearly defining the vision was lacking, and I pushed for creating this document.

Once again I found that people received me with open arms and open minds. Some of the differences were resolved. The key people in the community worked together to evolve a statement of purpose that was
acceptable to all. Some systemisation of the membership was also initiated. What emerged was not perfect, but it was the result of a collective effort and reflected a collective vision.

In the meanwhile Mia had finally managed to get internet connectivity and started coming to the Island again, and she added another dimension to the community dynamics.

I suppose nothing in this world is ideal… It would indeed have been ideal for Mia and the teacher to work together. Things were again 'happening' in the community, and this time it was not a process being pushed by a couple of persons, but a number of people were starting to
initiate activities of their interest. Different people were leading different projects. The teacher looked at issues from a coldly logical point of view. Mia had a more humane and instinctive approach. The need was for both to work in tandem. Unfortunately it was not to be.
And now for reasons not really known or understood by me, the teacher has just vanished…

But then a robust community doesn't just fall apart. It trundles along. If one individual leaves, another takes his/her place… So the journey is continuing and I am no longer a distant observer, but in the thick of it all! Even though I do try sincerely to maintain objectivity and try to stay detached… Try to keep reminding myself that building this community is an experiment and whichever way it goes, it will be 'successful' as it will end up teaching us all a lot about the dynamics in an intentional community.

The community has indeed evolved in remarkable ways over the past few months. But more about this in the next entry…

I agree with Gerry, as far as conflict resolution is concerned, we suck! I would have liked to have resolved the issue much better than we did - which actually was no resolution at all - just one of the parties disappeared, that's all.

As I think I said in a previous posting, I'm relieved because I just didn't want to face any more conflict.

Photo above: Mia and Cal in the 'famous' cave.

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Tagged with: second life, community, social experiment, getting involved, conflict resolution

Dealing With Egos In An Intentional Community

Posted on Nov 23rd, 2008 by

asecondlifediary

I'M HAPPY TO SAY that at long last the energy in our community seems to be moving ahead, with more members stepping forward to be involved in things and participating in group discussions.

We are now ALMOST ready to adopt a Statement of Principles that has been a work in progress for the past six months. It has already been accepted by one meeting group and will go before our other international time zone meeting group this coming Wednesday. Here is what our draft, which Cal has put together, says:

OUR PURPOSE:

To learn about creating sustainable intentional communities -- what works and what doesn't -- and to model such a community in Second Life.

We will do this by:

* Practising those aspects of sustainable living in intentional community in Second Life, to the extent this can be a useful learning experience e.g. consensus-building, collaboration, dispute resolution, collective decision-making etc.

* Doing real-life research on sustainable practices and intentional communities, on subjects that we each care about, and sharing the results of that research with other members and visitors. This could be done by creating a representation of this practice or aspect of community on our island, and attaching a notecard with the research and links to further information; or by holding educational events on our island. The areas we are doing research on, the location of our representations, and the schedule of events, would be posted in the barn.

Each member of our community will be asked to:

* Pursue the above purpose and to participate actively in its realization.

* Keep up to date on what others are doing in the community, through the website, forum etc.

* Attend meetings whenever possible, and when not possible, read up on the meeting notes.

* Assist in the management of the island and to discharge the duties and responsibilities that come with co-ownership of a Second Life community.

* Volunteer to do some research or to lead some area of practice, in an area of their choosing.

Definitions:

Sustainable: Able to continue indefinitely -- not requiring non-renewable resources, and not taking more from the land than it returns

Intentional Community: A group of people living, or making a living, together, who share a common purpose and/or set of values

Another issue we have been working on is a level of membership that more accurately reflects people's participation in the group. Probably our most active member, Rose, has worked her administrative magic on the mix of roles and responsibilities we created on the run, and has now brought them into some meaningful order.

We will have Visiting Members, Active Members and Land Group Members. Visiting Members can come and go as they wish, visiting, playing, bringing others, rezzing objects temporarily (which will be auto-returned after a certain amount of time). Active Members are those who provide 'energy' - organise events, participate in discussions, assist in projects etc. They will have a certain level of 'authority' on the island. Land Group Members are members of our community who consistently show their commitment to the community and are deemed to be involved enough to make decisions on behalf of the group (with consensus).

So ... it would seem that our 'house' is in order.

Ironically, the next issue which has come up and will probably take up a bit of our time and attention for the next little while is the subject of egos and conflict resolution. For better or worse, I am responsible for this coming to a head.

Initially, I was the main person on the island to provide the energy for more or less 'moving the community forward' - i.e. the one sending out notices, suggesting activities, welcoming people, organising get togethers, suggesting themes for our art exhibitions etc. More or less being a hostess I suppose.

After several months I got tired of feeling I was the only one 'putting in' and it coincided with me starting off on my journey around Australia anyway, so I was extremely pleased when a relatively new member stepped forward to take up the slack and be that person - the motivator, I guess.

Now, it's important to point out at this stage that I saw myself as perhaps the facilitator - the person who encouraged and helped things along. I didn't see it as my role to come up with the ideas or be responsible for the 'success' of the community. If the community didn't have the incentive or initiative to come up with ideas, groups, events etc., then it would never succeed as a community.

It had to be a joint effort, or there was no point calling us a community.

After a couple of months, she too got frustrated with being the only one who seemed to do all the work. She had done a tremendous amount of work in making sure people didn't exceed their prim limit and encouraged people in projects and sorted out things on our Ning website (which is perhaps our best communication tool that another community member set up for us).

One of the biggest issues we had was the belief by this woman that the community had to have a leader. She felt that this was Cal's responsibility - to be our group leader - while he didn't believe it was necessary. He wanted the group to be responsible for its direction, not him.

There was quite a bit of heat in the discussion, with both getting emotional about (1) being forced into a position they didn't want. Cal was angry because someone was 'demanding' that he do what he didn't want to do (because he felt it wasn't necessary); and the other woman because she was adamant the group needed a leader.

Consequently, she withdrew, "Taking a back seat," she said, to MAKE Cal see that without a leader, our group would fall apart.

It was gratifying to see (because both Cal and I feel that it's important the community has the power, not one individual), that others did come forward and offer ideas, thoughts, discussion points and the whole thing didn't come crashing down on our heads.

I believe that if you leave enough space, people will expand and grow into it.

Her 'taking a back seat', coincided with me at long last getting wireless internet while I'm on the road (courtesy of Cal), and so I was able to once more take a more active role in the community.

Basically, it comes down to two people who like to 'organise' now contributing in different ways to the community and coming in to conflict. Over the last several days there have been some exchanges between us that have left both of us feeling criticised, dominated, hurt, angry, betrayed, isolated and rejected. All pretty strong stuff.

Our ways of interacting with the world are just so different. She has a really great mind - quick and sharp. While I'm perhaps more of a dreamer - slow to process things and happy to let things flow.

I've come to the conclusion that we are two poles to the structure - both necessary, but poles apart!

She is feeling betrayed because, with her agreement, I took the issue to a small circle of our community members - Soj (who has a wonderful ability to see a situation in all its complexity and come up with a simple solution or an accurate observation); and Kalea (our wonderful Hawaiian member, who has a beautiful soul and all the wisdom of someone who has always lived in harmony with the natural world).

Basically, I think it comes down to both of us feeling that we have to 'protect' the community from the other. I feel she is too dominating and intimidating and people are afraid to come up with ideas and suggestions because she tends to jump on them and make suggestions to improve their input or demand they justify their position (at least that's how it seems to me). Others may feel she is giving good guidance and helping people.

She feels that I'm too airy-fairy and confuse the issue with my comments, interfering with group progress. She also pointed out to me that the community have come up with certain rules or ways of doing things while I have been travelling, and that I am acting too autonomously on the island without regard to the guidelines which the community have decided on in my absence.

Another issue that I think is at play here, IS a power struggle of some kind. I refuse to be dominated and am adamant that I am NOT answerable to this woman, I am answerable to our community.

She believes that Cal should LEAD the group and is very critical of him, for not taking up this responsibility. I can't help feeling that she believes if Cal isn't going to do it, she is the next best person to take it on. (Even though she denies this).

I think this woman has an exaggerated sense of responsibility. She has spoken about the group's 'reputation' and is concerned that the behaviour of some members is detrimental to that. She has objected to another community member always going around the island bare-bosomed (and sometimes showing her clitoris) - even removing the member's profile picture from our website because she was topless.

It's a delicate balance between allowing free expression to people and also taking into consideration other people's morale stances. Who should compromise? One person's morality shouldn't interfere with anothers. Should one cover up? Or should the other learn to accept?

My main concern in all of this is that the island and the community is always a place where people feel safe and can express themselves.

I worry that this woman's strong personality will deter people from feeling comfortable to put forward half-formed ideas or suggestions because they are afraid she will jump on them for not thinking things through before they present them to the group.

I would say, she is worried that my fuzzy thinking will hold back the group's progress.

For me, the journey is what is important, not the final destination. If we don't do things 'right', does it matter? It's what we've learned along the way that is important I feel.

If we do things one particular person's 'way' all the time, all that happens is that we learn to do things their way - to be trained in one person's way of thinking. This is being 'trained', not learning.

The good thing about all this, is that I really do like this woman and certainly value and honour what she has done for the community. I hope that our attachment to one another is strong enough to get us through this. As I said to her in an email, sooner or later, we as a community were going to have to deal with an issue which required us to develop conflict resolutions skills.

Perhaps it's a good thing that it's the two of us who are helping our community to learn this lesson. We started off liking one another - I hope we end up that way!

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Tagged with: Egos, Statement of Principles, Second Life, criticism, domination, hurt, anger

We're Half-Way There - so let's have a party!

Posted on Nov 8th, 2008 by

asecondlifediary

IN A FEW DAYS, our community will be six months old, so we have decided to have a "Half Way There" birthday celebration on our beautiful island.

One of our members, MeLa has created a lovely floating platform which sits on the north-western corner of our island, facing the wonderful beach created by another member, Rose.

Our community now has over 40 members - some more involved than others - but all loving the atmosphere of the island itself.

Either I, or Cal, will write again soon filling you in more thoroughly about developments on the island. I am presently still travelling, although I'm nestled into a very comfortable place in Esperance (Western Australia) where I am hoping to stay for the summer and enjoy the gorgeous ocean beaches here.

Several issues have arisen in our community, with the major one being, "Should we have a leader?" General consensus seems to be that since Cal is the one who paid for the island and continues to make the monthly tier payments, that he should be 'the boss', but this is a position he adamantly refuses to take on.

I have more of a bossy nature, and while I don't particularly want to be the leader of the group, there are times when I think it would all just be a lot simpler if I said, "Okay, I'll be a boss" just so we can get on with other things. The thing that strikes me most is the attitude that the person who pays for something should naturally just assume the authority of calling the shots.

Both Cal and I were hoping that the community would coalesce into a new kind of society which wouldn't require one person in charge. Our intention would be that we would all occupy the island together and make decisions with group consensus.

We're still optimistic that this will happen. It just might take some time for people to come to the same conclusion that we have - that we have the perfect opportunity to create a whole new society here - one of our own design, rather than just perpetuating old models.

We are very democratic on the island and because I am an impatient sort of person, sometimes I do find the endless meetings and discussion of issues rather tedious, but in the long run it's the only way we are going to show people a new way of living together. It still surprises me that people are quite content to let someone else make all the decisions for them.

Cal is much better at consensus than I. I tend to be of the "Lead, Follow or Get Out Of The Way" philosophy. lol But then, he's a much nicer person.

Anyone who reads this blog, and who would like to come to our "Half Way There" party, please leave us a message here and we'll be in touch to give you all the details.

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Tagged with: New society, leader, consensus, democracy, celebration

Beautiful New Beach

Posted on Aug 25th, 2008 by

asecondlifediary

SORRY FOR NEGLECTING YOU SO LONG, but so much has happened in the past month or so ... It's just life really, but life has a way of jumping up and smacking you in the face sometimes.

The good news is that we have a beautiful new beach section - "The Rocky Foreshore" I've labelled it. One of our new members hails from a tiny little Hawaiian village and she took me to see a beach which reminded her of home and I was so awed by how realistic it was that I raved to another member, who then went out and bought the waves, rocks and sea effects necessary to reproduce it on our island.

The soft photo above of Cal on the rocks is just so beautiful! I've told him that I think we should use it as a promotional shot for our community.

Rose, who is an engineer, then set to work creating the magnificent seascape you see above. It still needs some refining and this will happen over time, but I've found that I just can't leave the beach! The rocks have a variety of poses over them, which mean you can sprawl out with lots of friends in realistic poses and the effect is so 'real', that it's proving a powerful drawcard.

That's one of the appeals of Second Life - while it is a suspense of disbelief in some ways (i.e. all you need is the 'suggestion' of a mountain to 'believe' it's a mountain), when you get it right and the 'feel' of a place 'grabs you', then you are truly connected in some way. Maybe I'm not explaining myself properly - the only way to understand what I'm trying to convey here, is to experience it yourself. To go into Second Life and experience as many different places and 'moods' as you can.

Our Community has now swelled to around 30 people, with about 8 people joining last week after I contacted everyone who had visited the island in the previous month. We hosted a visit from a like-minded community last week and from the comments being made by those on the tour, they were impressed with what we'd done on our island.

It will be interesting to see how these new members are 'absorbed' into the community - indeed, if they even become a part of it. It's one thing to join a group, it's quite another to 'belong' to it, or be a part of it.

As from next week, I'll be on the road and my visits to Second Life will be very infrequent, so it's going to be interesting to see what happens with our community. Because I have been so active in creating the island and 'hosting' it, I think there is very much an identification of me with the island. When I'm not there so much, I hope someone else or indeed, a number of other people, step forward to 'personalise' the island, so that visitors and other members feel there is some 'presence' there - a personality to the island perhaps.

Cal continues to be very busy with his work and home obligations, but is getting more involved with 'administrative' type activities on the island - sending out group notices, organising get togethers etc.

I'm so excited about this adventure I'm embarking on, but I'm also really curious how my absence on the isand will affect the community. I'm so intrigued to see who will take up the slack and who will grow from the experience of 'hosting' visitors and being responsible for giving our community its 'voice'.

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Tagged with: Second Life, realistic beach, powerful connection

I'm Heading Off For Awhile

Posted on Jul 21st, 2008 by

asecondlifediary

YOU'VE HEARD JOHN LENNON'S SAYING? "Life is what happens to you when you're busy making others plans" ... well, that's what has happened to me. Life has come up with a plan for me, which I didn't particularly have in mind for this time.

Since Cal and I met in real life a couple of months ago, our relationship has changed and I'm still adjusting to that change. We still love one another dearly, but the 'intimacy' that we used to have has evolved into a more comfortable friendship - at least I think it has. We're still looking at the options of perhaps living in the same intentional community, but for the moment neither of us know if that will happen, or if it does, where it will happen.

We had spoken about him coming here to Australia and I've looked at one place (too cold) and made contact with another (too expensive) and it was on my mind that when I had the time and money, I would go and check out a few communities further north from here. Then, out of the blue, my new next door neighbour contacted me expressing a wish to buy my house in the country (where I haven't lived for a couple of years). The house has been left empty during that time, and after agonising over it for a day or two, I decided that yes, the time was right for me to let the house have a new life for itself, with new owners.

So .... come settlement day, I will be all cashed up and it seemed opportune to head off on a road trip - to have a look at different intentional communities, but also to finish a journey I started 20 years or so ago, but got waylaid during.

This time I will be heading west, along the Great Australian Bight and over to Perth, up to Darwin and then back down the east coast of Australia. I've set myself a time frame of one year.

This is a long-winded way of saying that my involvement in our Second Life intentional community will be very much reduced in the coming 12 months. I will be taking my laptop with me and doing some writing, but won't have constant internet access, which will be a good thing for me as SL has become quite an addiction for me. I'm looking forward to occasionally coming across an internet cafe and being able to interact with the lovely community which is growing up there.

My time on the road will be spent thinking, reading and writing and taking walks and photos. Nothing more demanding than that. (Apart from the challenge of living on $200 a week, which will be a story in itself).

But the big news is that FINALLY I think our community is starting to take shape. There are around 15 or so members now and a core group of eight who are quite committed to the ethos we are developing.

The island has remained natural (apart from a welcome sign, a couple of rugs and some tiki torches) and we have a gallery which members seem to be enjoying using. Our next exhibition will start off with one photo which might be of say, a boy on an elephant in a jungle and the next person has to put up a photograph of something which has a connection to that - it might be of a boy, an elephant, jungle or perhaps someone riding something different. I'm really curious to see what our final photo will be of. It's a kind of six-degrees-of-separation kind of thing.

Another step forward has been our marooning for the month of July. Dayana, our exotic voluptuous dancer member, has been the most conscientious - I think she's only ventured off the island once - while I got bored by around the 18th and was seduced by an invitation or two off island. But the idea of being shipwrecked on the island, did help us to really focus on spending time together.

This has been helped by a recent innovation where we have decided to establish a skybox over the top of the island where people can go for privacy. I've set it up in rather neutral colours, but we thought we would try a roster system where (for example), I would decorate the skybox in my taste or theme for the week (which might end up being a month) so I get a chance to bring out all my furniture and precious possessions which don't really 'fit' or suit the theme of the island.

The next week (or month), it will be someone else's turn to decorate the skybox in their taste. This means we will have the opportunity for creativity, both in the gallery, the skybox and on the island. All areas on the island (and above) remain communal, so while someone might occupy a particular spot for that particular time, no one has 'ownership' over it.

We now have a range of 'experiences' - the natural island; a gallery where we can display art and personal photos; the flying submarine which is a real Jules Verne experience and which everyone loves; a Paradise Blanket which rezzes a holodeck which enables users to choose a location such as Paris, or Venice or the Garden of Eden, or a camping spot etc. And now, with the privacy skybox, we also have someplace for couples to interact with one another in privacy.

I was really gratified when one member, who has a house elsewhere in SL expressed the thought that maybe they would give up their house and focus on the community instead. This, I believe, is a step in the right direction.

Soooooo .... from here on in, posts from me will probably be a bit scarce. Hopefully Cal will have the time to keep everyone up to date, or we may find someone else in the group who might like to take it on. Either way - we'll still let you all know what's happening in our lovely little world.

Mia

(Picture above: Our very lovely flying-submarine which is proving to be a popular gathering spot for the community).

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Tagged with: Second Life, community growing, variety of experiences, going away

Getting To Know One Another

Posted on Jul 12th, 2008 by

asecondlifediary

YESTERDAY was the first time that I thought, "Our group is now getting to the size where I am starting to not know our new members." In the last week or so, we have had six people join our community - the last two of whom I haven't even met, much less get to know.

This is slightly unsettling for me as I've always felt that I've got it 'under control' (inasmuchas knowing everyone and everything that is going on). Visitor numbers are increasing, with over 100 having been recorded in the past couple of weeks. Even group members have observed that there always seems to be someone on the island these days.

Our experiment with being marooned on the island has also been relatively successful, with Daya being the most enthusiastic and conscientious about being around. She is such an avid supporter of the island and has provided us with the most beautiful 'flying submarine' vessel, designed very much in the Jules Verne style with Dunesque paintings inside. It has proven to be a popular gathering spot and has given our community a kind of 'clubhouse' for gathering in.

There was quite a bit of discussion about whether we should have it on the island as it is most certainly not 'natural' but I fell in love with it (as did everyone else) and even Cal couldn't deny its charms. Consequently, we compromised and allowed it on to the sim, but located it up underneath our Gaia Galleria skybox, so it's not immediately visible to the casual visitor.

We are still going through the process of deciding what we are about and what we want to achieve with our community. Porena, on our NING site, mentions how we are endeavouring to create a community which will be able to deal with the end of the oil age, but at this stage we haven't done a thing about being political or activist about anything to do with the oil industry. I'm not even sure that the majority of the community are even that political.

Cal, Porena and Sojourner are probably the most concerned about environmental issues - as in doing anything specific on the issue. Everyone else is 'aware' but not dedicated (at least as far as I can tell). No raging activists in our group! Although both Porena and Harps have written books on the subject of the environment and sustainability - which I will highlight in an upcoming blog.

For the moment, we are still going slowly, slowly, slowly in building our community - "Two Truth and a Lie" at last week's weekly gathering and 'Hide & Seek' this week. All fun and games. Which is a good balance from the rather weighty matters of previous meetings - "What do we stand for?" and "What is our goal?"

It's always a balancing act between encouraging people to participate in community building and allowing them to enjoy their experience of Second Life, which is either an escapist forum or a very useful social experiment opportunity.

We've also put on an exhibition of our community members' photographs, which is another way for us to get to know one another a bit more, ALTHOUGH most members have chosen to present Second Life pics, rather than real life photos. Again, Daya has jumped in and put on a slide show of her hang gliding activities.

Actually Daya deserves special mention for her enthusiastic endorsement of our island - she is constantly inviting friends and acquaintances over and was the very first person to put up her hand when we suggested actually being 'marooned' on the island for the whole month of July. She has gotten into the spirit of making the island her home and has put fish into the lake, and shares her beautiful craft as a home base for us, and seems to be always there to greet visitors as well.

In coming weeks, I will feature our members, week by week, so you get to meet them all.

As a teaser, above is a photo collage that our lovely Soj put together for the exhibition.

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Tagged with: Second Life, community size, knowing one another, photo exhibition, enthusiastic support

Our First Experiment - "Being Marooned!"

Posted on Jul 2nd, 2008 by

asecondlifediary

AFTER SOME DISCUSSION regarding whether this whole Intentional Community idea is for real or just pretend, some of our group decided last weekend that we would commit to only being on our island whenever we were in Second Life. I especially wanted to experience what it would be like to be 'marooned' and having to survive on just what we had with us.

For as long as I've been in SL (which is just over a year now), I've come across people who say, "It's only a game!" but for me, it's real. This is the life I would love to live. A life of endless possibilities and just imagining something and then having it come true (albeit virtually).

Here are some of the (edited) points made by members of our community at our meeting after Cal had distributed a draft "Principles Document" he had prepared. Bear in mind that there is sometimes a bit of 'chat lag' so that someone can make a comment, and it might take awhile for people's response to appear on the screen for others to read.

This, I think, was a pivotal conversation for us to have:

Mik: Well I for one still find it hard to figure out HOW translating some of these principles will actually work in a world like Second Life. The entertainment bit I get, but it only takes one idiot to mess up a consensus.

Soj: My impression is certainly positive--I like the general tenor and the points made. I will take issue with some of the details.

Mik: the bit where it says "communities do not need artificial environments" ....bit of a misnomer perhaps given we are IN an artificial environment right here and now huh?

Cal: no you're right mik -- bad wording but you know what i mean. I meant the global term for 'tar and cement'.

Cal: what i'm trying to get at here is something we can show to visitors that says 'What We're About', what we stand for and also helps guide what we talk about each week and how we behave here in between

Gem: overall- great- I came here for company( Intelligent)- and to learn- it works for me.

Arch: my main point boils down to the discussion harps and I are having on Ning

Mia: Yes, that's where I have some 'issues/points' too Arch ... that distinction between real life representation and second life.

Mia: I was wanting to recreate society and just leave out all the irrelevant parts in here.

Arch: my point is about 'sustainability'... as long as we put outside money into SL... without it giving that back... it's a bit like buying food in the store

Mik: I'm wondering if its not all back to front you know

Mia: I think that's where we started to go off the rails a bit earlier Cal - that eagerness to make ourselves a showcase ....

Mia: We should create the society / model and then showcase it ..... and that might take a year for us to be 'ready'.

Gem: and surely a cohesive society works better for all

Soj: Yes, I like the idea of a statement of purpose. Something we can show to each other and others--but we must all have some sort of common understanding of it, interpretation.

Cal: we would show visitors the island of course, but then i think we need to tell them This is What We Stand For

Mia: Yes ... and that's the hard part! lol

Mik: and dear Cal .... not all of us agree on what we stand for here yet... :)

Mia: Let's go around the circle again and once more reiterate what we would like to see happen here.

Cal: I tried to word the Draft Principles generally, but if we disagree that's what we need to discuss and reach consensus on.

Soj: Yes, we need discussion. I don't think we should worry about when we are ready to showcase.

Mik: what you see for the real world is really really hard for me to grasp as a viable concept for in here.

Soj: and I can grasp half of it

Mia: Basically, it comes down to "How we would like to live our lives" - regardless of whether it's real world or second life. Doesn't it?

Mik: which is basically the spiritual philosophy of a tribe I guess Mia

Mik: the founding principles of a tribe are mostly about what the tribe BELIEVE in

Cal: If we were in the Elf lands or Gor lands there would be certain principles that would affect our behaviour...that's what we need to find for this 'tribe'

Arch: yes, I agree to that Cal

Cal: I agree mik..but it's what we believe reflected in how we 'live'

Mik: yes both work simultaneously

Mia: Okay, what's our over riding principle? The banner we live under?

Soj: I think it starts from "How we would like to live our lives" , but has to be something we know how to interpret in terms of SL.

Cal: I think in a previous meeting, we called it "Living Naturally"

Gem : tolerance????

Mik: The ethical development of Life?

Mia: Yes, that's part of it Gem.

Soj: i like those

Mia: Ethics, certainly.

Cal: now we're getting somewhere

Arch: 'naturally' is a bit of a weird word for SL

Mia: Not over-burdening ourselves with stuff.

Arch: I would prefer self reliant

Mia: Living Simply? Does that sound better?

Arch: yes

Soj: Living well means living well in the world (nature) and with others (harmoniously, ethically, with respect and compassion, ...).

Mia: Self reliant is another good principle to have.

Mik: hear hear soj

Arch: self sustaining would be my goal

Cal : I like that soj

Mia: Living A Simple Life, Well

Cal: and self-sustaining and self-reliant i like too, arch

Soj: Self-sustaining might be part of living well in nature and in society.

Mia: How can we be self-sustaining here?

Cal: let's capture all this and not try to reduce it to a slogan

Mik: so in HERE in Second Life ...forgetting or putting aside for a moment the notion of transference to the first world..... what does that actually mean?

Mia: What does self-sustainability mean here?

Cal: we're self-sustaining by not using resources that have to come from outside the island

Mia: eventually, everything here will be built by us and gradually replaced as we become more skilled.

There was some discussion about the actual ownership of the island and whether people felt it was necessary for everyone to feel a sense of 'financial ownership', but the general consensus was that if went with the precept that this is an island we have been shipwrecked on, the issue of ownership doesn't come into it.

Mik: I agree with Arch that if we philosophically want to demonstrate self-sustainability...we need to self generate lindens independent of our own real world finances

Soj: Self-sustainability is an interesting goal, but how can you do it here or in RL? Very difficult, either way. Should we be religious about it, or shift slowly in that direction?

Mia: Basically, my primary objective is to create a new kind of society. Where we start off having our basic needs met.

Gem: But that will evolve

Mik: it will. like any tribe that comes together, whether by choice or not

Mik: are we actually all good friends here? do we all really know and care about one another? do we want the best for each other?

Arch: if we were to stick to the castaway idea

Cal: mik has a point

Arch: maybe it would help for us all to be actually 'trapped' here like mik (Mik has been having some technical difficulties which mean she has to log off and on each time she wants to teleport anywhere).

Cal: it's pretty easy to survive in a paradise, but we still have the challenge of not really knowing and trusting each other...yet

Arch: no chances to go shopping ^^

Mia: That's an interesting suggestion .... perhaps we should all REALLY be trapped here to reinforce the experience of having to be self-reliant.

Soj: I'm having trouble thinking about all this because I am constantly alternating between two modes: (1) let's do it for real--such as learning how to work together; and (2) "let's pretend", such as creating an agricultural economy, building shelters, etc.

Mik: actually soj...I'm inclined to suggest forget trying to make this REAL for now, as in transferring the concept from SL to real life and just learn how to like and get along with strangers first.

Mia: Okay ... so there's the crux of the issue ... are we doing this for REAL or PRETEND?

Mia : I personally like the idea of being marooned here ...

Cal: a bit of both i think...we've got to try not to take this TOO seriously. i wouldn't want to say to everyone here you can't go anywhere else in SL

Mia: No ... but we can voluntarily commit to the 'experiment'

Cal: but while we're here we should pretend that this is all we have

Mia: I think it's a really interesting exercise

Gem: It could get lonely if there is no one here

Mik: oh hey....just try not being able to TP anywhere for a week...you will be frustrated I guarantee you

Arch: well... my personal strategy of bootstrapping my SL existence... is taking it quite for 'real'

Mia : But that's also an interesting point Gem ... being here on your own ...

Cal: maybe what we need to PRACTICE most is learning much more about each other

Mia: What about if we committed to it for say, one month. Just so we can experience that feeling of being marooned with what we have and being thrown back on to our own resources to survive.

Mik: what it will "force" are the bonds of relationships with group members I think

Soj: Well, if we're going to pretend we are marooned, what are the rules of the game? Can I use classes in SL? Can I use the web? Can I visit other lands? Can I spend dollars to upload images? Can I invite visitors? Can I shop in SL? Freebies?

Arch : wait a sec people... no one can be actually be marooned in SL... either I simply don't log on or I use an alt to go elsewhere

Cal: soj, the marooned stuff would only apply while we are HERE in PP

Mia : I don't ever see SL as a 'game' Soj .... only as a means of expressing myself.

Mia : That's the whole point of being MAROONED ... you don't go anywhere else. This becomes your whole world. Whenever we come online, this is where we are.

Cal: if we're going to learn to know each other better we need to commit to more than one hour a week together though. (Which is when most people come together for our weekly meetings).

Cal: mia, i don't think many of us will go for that

Mik: that's a personal commitment for each person to make and one that must not be forced upon them I think

Soj: But it is a game if you want others to share a "let's pretend" attitude, such as let's pretend we are gathering food to eat.

Mik: natural development is exactly that

Mia: No, I'm not trying to force it upon anyone ... I'm only throwing it out there as a "let's see how we go with this kind of challenge"

Gem : yes- Thats my point- I'm here at odd hours- like most people and if there is no one here- it defeats the purpose of a tribe!

Cal: right..what if we found three times a week where we could PRACTICE being a tribe together, as if we had been marooned together

Arch: besides Gem just brought up a real point: we are NOT always here and to get to be a tribe.. we need to be together

Soj: I'm "game". I don't know where it will go, but I expect I'll enjoy it. It will be hard to find common times.

Soj: We're not really ready to agree to a purpose and set of principles for our community. While we generally agree with the gist of it--living a simpler life, in greater harmony with the world and society--it's damned hard to say how that applies to a community in SL. So for now we are content with learning how to be together and getting to know each other better. Pretending we're marooned is a way to start to do that.

Of course there were other things we talked about and we even had a game of "Two Truths and A Lie" just to get to know one another, which everyone enjoyed as a 'getting to know you' exercise.

More news next week.

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Tagged with: Second Life, being marooned, commitment

Thoughts on the Objective for an Intentional Community in SL

Posted on Jun 27th, 2008 by

asecondlifediary

This is a first draft of a statement of purpose for our Intentional Community in Second Life, that I'm hoping we will discuss at our regular Sunday evening meeting. -- Cal

Our Purpose:

Our island is our Second Home, our return to the Garden. We resolve to live simply here, naturally, without things we don't need.

We want to show that:

a life based on principles of sufficiency, simplicity, responsibility, sustainability and harmony can be easy, enjoyable, enriching, healthy, liberating, and good for the environment;
entertaining ourselves can be more fun than relying on others to create entertainment for us, and that learning from and with each other can be more fulfilling and capacity-building than having others inform us and tell us what to think and do;
communities do not need artificial environments, private property, leaders, boundaries, laws or restrictions to work and to be wonderful places to live; and
decisions made and conflicts resolved by trusting and placing responsibility on each community member, or by consensus, are better than decisions made by majority vote or conflicts resolved by arguments, threats, third party intervention or violence.

We want to learn, by trial and error and study, how the most successful communities find and assess new members in a fair and equitable manner.

There are some aspects of living in a real-life intentional community that do not really apply in Second Life (e.g. making a living, dealing with children, pets, health and education issues, security against hostile outsiders, inequality of income and assets, discrimination, self-actualization, buying land and building shelter together, the need to collaborate, and acceptance of interdependence). We want to explore, through conversation and through research, how we might deal with these issues if we were in a real-life intentional community together.

We will do these things through:

'living' together in community, in a way consistent with this purpose and these principles, being a model that outsiders can see and study;
regular themed discussions on how we might deal with real-life intentional community issues;
developing a process to identify and invite prospective new members to visit and to assess who should be a member of our community; and
creating our own simple, responsible, sustainable activities that allow us to have fun, share knowledge, and learn together.

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Tagged with: intentional community, second life, gravitational community

Emergent Community: Intentional, Accidental, Gravitational

Posted on Jun 21st, 2008 by

asecondlifediary

I've been watching the development of our 'Intentional' Community with great interest. Mia did most of the work creating the physical space for the community (and it has become one of the most beautiful places in Second Life). The rest of the community members fall into three categories:

1. People who want to talk seriously about important issues and ideas
2. People who want to build, design, enhance, 'develop' the physical space
3. People who want to play

Because I'm getting serious about the idea of Intentional Community (both the use of SL as a laboratory for testing IC concepts like finding new members, consensus building and dispute resolution, and applying these 'laboratory' learnings to create an IC in real life), I'm currently part of the first category.

My sense is that curious visitors to our community mostly fall into category 3, and, because the physical space is deliberately natural and simple, so there is not much to play with (unlike some places in SL where games, simulations, contests and role-playing dominate), I don't expect these visitors to stay around long.

Likewise, because our space is limited in the number of things you can put on it (you get the space for 1/4 the price but you can only have 1/4 the number of objects on it), the category 2 people, who are doing most of the 'work' in the community now, will soon run out of things that can be done, and will, I suspect, get bored and disengage from the community.

I'm hopeful that, with a bit of viral marketing by those of us in category 1, we will ultimately attract more people who just want to use this beautiful, natural place as a space for love, conversation and community. I don't know if that will happen or not -- Second Life has a lot of escapists, emotionally troubled people, and people who find intelligent, purposeful conversation too slow, boring, and too much work to keep their interest. And there are already some other places (though none as attractive as ours) whose purpose is principally conversation of one type or another.

What is happening, and will continue to happen, I think, regardless of how we do or don't market our community, is that some sense of common purpose or intent will emerge among the members who gravitate to our community. I am hopeful that that will be a category 1 purpose, but if it is not, that's OK too. Worst case scenario is I'll spend more of my Second Life time elswehere than our island, finding the intelligent conversation there.

We designed our island as a model for Intentional Community. It has begun, largely as an Accidental Community of people Mia and I know and others who have stumbed on the place. It is quickly becoming a Gravitational Community, with some people opting out and others joining by virtue of having shared interests with other members. It has currently 3 centres of gravity, corresponding to the 3 categories of members/visitors above. It remains to be seen which will emerge as the sustainable centre(s) of gravity. To a certain extent I think mass attracts mass, and one or two or perhaps three different communities will end up living here, each an Intentional Community with a shared purpose.

But we cannot rush or impose that shared purpose until we know who will accept our invitiations to join, and who will stay. As they say in Open Space, whoever accept the invitation, come and stay are the 'right' people.

It is fascinating watching that complex process unfold.

/-/ Cal

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Tagged with: intentional community, second life, gravitational community

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